Yeah, yeah, it should be RSM Friday, turns out it's Monday already.
WHAT-evah.
I had weekend issues. And broadband issues. And monster work deadline issues. But here's a little something I almost had ready for you on Friday, truly, before real life took over...
Bon appetit.
***
What goes 'Ha ha plonk'?
Ah yes, my first riddle.
First of many, many, many.
My poor parents.
They travelled by road for a whole year when I was six-going-on-seven years old.
Me.
Them.
My toddling middle brother.
A caravan, a basset hound (Benji), a budgerigar (Arthur), a Ford F-100, a Shell Service Station passport.
A folded up trampoline.
Maps to the whole of Eastern Australia.
And: My Big Book of 1001 Riddles.
Q. What does go 'ha ha plonk'?
A. A man laughing his head off, of course.
On and on, we drove, as the miles quite literally turned into kilometres that year (Dad got a set of little stickers to put on the speedometer so he knew how fast he was going without dividing by 5/8ths).
And riddle after riddle after riddle did I ask.
Q. What's yellow and dangerous?
A. Shark-infested custard.
I still remember how tactfully my mother (middle brother perched on her lap, no such thing as a booster seat) would say "Just one more now, then we'll play another game for a while..." *
Q. What did the bus conductor say to the man with three heads, no arms and one leg?
A. 'Ello, 'ello, 'ello. You look 'armless, 'op aboard!
So many places we saw, so many towns they could have decided to live in forever. And yet we still ended up in a hole on top of a mountain. (Apologies for the formatting if you bother to click through; it's my first attempt at copying over some of my Blogger archives and I'm not sure it's worth it.)
My parents, of course, by then had their little farm and their second son on the way and all the adult joys of stability and a roof over the head and the parrots arriving at dawn.
Q. What has five heads, 12 arms, 27 legs and REALLY big teeth?
A. I don't know, but look out! It's right behind you!
I, on the other hand, had lost the blissful freedom of correspondence school, the new beach to explore every other week, and the fun of being just one among many strangers wherever we stayed.
But I still had my Giant Book of Riddles.
Q. If you drop a green hat in the Red Sea, what does it become?
A. Wet.
Oh, and a pony. Did I mention the pony ever before? They got me a pony. That made up for a lot.
Now. Where were we?
Oh crap. Root, shoot, marry!
My goodness. Not only am I late in getting this posted, I'm late in getting to the point, too.
So, to quickly recap (and prove there really was some RSM relevance to all the above),
Do You Remember Last Week?
First up, the winner of the Spot the Inspiration blogger quiz was
(da, da, dah -DAH)
CRAFTY of the Allydillydally CraftyMum blog
who was the first person to correctly match the inspirer to the inspiration for last week's, this week's and next week's themes.
Crafty wins 1,000,000 RSM points, a Green Card and a set of steak knives. Clever lass.
Katy at Kamsarmer suggested 'progeny'. And a damn fine idea it is, too. Stay tuned for that one.
Tony was responsible for the pirates of the latest RSM, and H&B came up with the comedians idea a little while ago.
And that, my friends, is where I am leaving you for tonight.
(Right, this is the part where you collectively go AWWWWWW!! - or possibly, "Bitch")
Because I'm knackered, and I've spent way too much time on this, the Warm Up Act for H&B's most excellent suggestion of RSM -The Comedy Special.
It's coming soon, probably tomorrow night (believe me?) when I'm hoping to be past the worst of my current monster work deadlines.
mtc
Bec
* Every Sunday, when the riddle-laden newspaper comics arrive, and my Pea Princess commences her epic readings of said riddles, and I laugh at the first, and I chuckle at the second, and I chortle at the third, and I start to grind my teeth at the fourth... I think of my poor sainted mother, and I wonder that such tolerance could ever have existed on this earth.